Smart Ass Answer #6
It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. "What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied.
Smart Ass Answer #5
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket & he opened his trench coat & flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."
Smart Ass Answer #4
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at a grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
Smart Ass Answer #3
The cop got out of his car & the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Smart Ass Answer #2
A truck driver was driving on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low bridge ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him & he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car & walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips & says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge & ran out of gas."
SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006:
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand & asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete & utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter & snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smile knowingly at the student, shakes her head & sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
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